Baby B has been progressing wonderfully. We had a growth ultrasound today and he is measuring over all in the 36th percentile for size. The best news is there is still NO sign of hydrocephalus. He is still breech which doesn't change a thing since we already scheduled a C-section. He also has been a little stinker at our weekly appointments. Although he still scores 10/10, he needs a lot of encouragement to move around and accelerate his heart rate. Today, I was told I have the beginning of preeclampsia. My blood pressure, which is normally 100/60, was 138/64 today with protein present in my urine. My feet have also swelled up and I have been exhausted. I was told to take the day off, stay off my feet, and I have to go back in Friday to be rechecked. If my bp is at 140 or higher, there is still protein in my urine, and any labs come back abnormal, my C-section will be moved up to the coming week.

Last Thursday, my sister (who has a seizure disorder) started having seizures around 6 a.m. We are unsure of how many she had throughout the day. Around 5 p.m., she was brought to the ER by her step-daughter, Megan. Kenny and I met them there and counted at least 6 seizures in about 3 1/2 hours. She stayed in the postictal stage, never fully coming out of the seizures. She was admitted to the local hospital's ICU on a Dilantin drip to try and stop the seizures. Around 6 Friday morning, she was sedated and intubated and the decision to transfer her to Abbott Northwest's Neuro ICU was made. She continued to seize even after being put on a propofol drip. Around 10 or 11 that morning, they were finally able to stop all seizure activity. She would stay intubated, sedated, and restrained until Saturday. They had also placed an NG tube to give medications orally that could not be given through her PICC line and would be utilized for nutrition if needed. She was in the Neuro ICU until Sunday, when she was transferred to the epilepsy floor at ANW. She was discharged to home on Tuesday and has been slowly recovering since. 

I cannot even begin to express my deep sense of fear, loss, and uncertainty seeing my baby sister like that. I am very close to her and our relationship has always been on the top of my priority list. To say I lost it would be an understatement. I had no idea what was happening to her. What was causing these? Would she come out okay? Would she come out at all? I "prayed without ceasing" for 5 days. Seriously God?! You haven't given me enough to deal with that you thought you would just add this? What greater good can come of this? What is this suppose to teach us? I highly doubt I will ever get those answers during this lifetime. Funny thing was, I kept talking to her. About everything. Everything that was going regarding her, her kids, life, the weather. I didn't stop talking to her. And, guess what? She answered me. Not out loud. Her lips didn't move. But I could hear her replies. Most of them were on the smart ass side, which is totally normal for her. :) But I felt confident and at peace with every decision I made for her or on her behalf because I knew it was what she wanted. Even if I wasn't so sure. Now, I'm not saying she was coming to me from the other side. I'm saying that we have the type of relationship and know each other so well, that we can anticipate how the other would respond. I am so incredibly grateful to have that type of connection with someone in this life and then call that person my sister.  All I can say about this experience is to make sure your loved ones know what you want in any circumstance, no matter how unlikely you think it may be. Don't just make sure they know what you want, have it documented. No one wants to be put in the position to make decisions for you about your life. You can make it a little easier on them by making your wants and needs known.

So my past week would explain why I am beginning to develop preeclampsia! It has been immensely stressful. But again, I have to give thanks for my amazing husband, family, and friends who really rallied around me and Jeni. Your thoughts, prayers, and gestures kept us going. I really have to brag up my husband here... He's such a great person and I'm humbled by his love. I can only hope that I can be deserving of that love and reciprocate it back to him. I wasn't even off the phone with Megan when she was bringing Jeni to the ER, when Kenny started turning everything off and getting his shoes on. There was no need to ask him to come with or explain at that moment all that was happening. He was already on board to go and sit for who knows how long until we had answers. The next morning, he was arranging everything so we could be at ANW with her. Even though he worked all weekend, he came straight there after work and even offered to stay the night with her. He has been there every darn step of the way without so much as being asked or prompted to. God broke the mold when He made Kenny.

Not much has changed the last 3 weeks with Baby B. He has been doing well on his non-stress tests and bio physicals. We had one day last week that he wasn't being cooperative, but I didn't have to go to the hospital to be monitored. I went back the next morning to redo the test and, although he was reluctant at first, he received a 10 out of 10. I think we just caught him during a nap and he was not going to be disturbed! He continues to practice breathe all the time. Seriously, they tell you that they only do it sometimes, but there has not been a single ultrasound in which he did not practice breathe the entire time they were doing it.

Baby B has been breach since about 32 weeks. I asked the nurse at my last appointment how long babies have to flip into the head down position and she said they are usually in the position they will stay in 32-34 weeks. There is a small chance he will flip, but it usually only happens when there is a lot of extra amniotic fluid. Thankfully, both baby's and mine measurements have been within normal range. Armed with that information and my fear of another emergency C-section, Kenny and I, along with our team of doctors, have decided to schedule our C-section. When the ultrasound tech told me that he was still breach, I actually looked at that as an answer to my prayers. I have been praying about whether to attempt a VBAC or just schedule a C-section. I am so scared that I would have to have an emergent one and with all my other concerns about how baby will be, I don't think I could handle the stress. So, Thank you God! I needed that decision off my plate. :)

Knowing when you are going to have your baby is both freeing and anxiety ridden. I am able to arrange Natalie's care. Kenny and I have been able to let our employers know the exact date our leave will start. My sister is able to know when she will have to arrange for someone to take her kids to school and pick them up so she can be at the hospital with me. Yet, on the other hand, I know exactly how little time I have to get my butt in gear to get everything ready! The difference between my first pregnancy and this one is astounding. I had the nursery done over a year before Natalie was born. Everything was ready to go, from the bottles being sterilized, all the clothes and bedding washed in free and sensitive laundry detergent, to my bag packed and car seat in the car by the time I hit 36 weeks. Here I am, almost 36 weeks and I don't even have the crib up! I don't know which outfit I will bring him home in.(Which is more because I don't know what will be appropriate for him to wear than not having options.) I don't have a single bottle sterilized or diapers and wipes ready to go. The more I think about all that needs to be done, the more I just want to roll in the fetal position and cry. I have grand plans every day to tackle things, but there are more days like today than not. Today, beside battling a cold I have had for over a week and a headache that made me nauseous, I have also been having really bad Braxton Hicks contractions all last night and today. Who ever says that BH contractions aren't painful deserves to be kicked in the gut with steel toe shoes every couple of minutes for a few hours. They are painful enough to wake me up from a dead sleep.

Enough complaining, though. With a date set and being pretty sure this is our last child, I have been really wanting to have maternity pictures taken. I have been thinking about booking them, but get momma guilt because I didn't do them with Natalie and feel like it would unfair to do it with this one. However, I'm sure there will be things that I will have done with Natalie that I won't do with Baby B. I don't know if I can fit one more thing into an already jam packed schedule. But just writing it down that I have wanted to have pictures has made me more decided on doing it.

Natalie will be starting pre-k this week. I can't believe my little girl will be going to school already. I honestly wouldn't have thought to start her this early, but she goes with my sister to her kid's school and LOVES it. It's a very small private school and Natalie will go and sit in with the pre-k class when she is bored with her aunty. She loves the teacher, Mrs. Petzel. Every time she sees a school bus, she wants to ride it, carries her cousins backpacks around, and "helps" them with their homework. She is so excited to start. I know she won't carry that enthusiasm long for school, so I'm glad we can start her when she wants to go so much.